Initial days of marriage!

While we make plans for a grand wedding and for the perfect life, we hardly bother to think about ,what awaits us immediately after marriage.

Adapting to a new home comes with several challenges. From adjusting to new beliefs and traditions to setting up a new life.New set of parents,siblings and lots more.

The anxiety level is quite similar to first day of college or even more.You were a child till one day,protected by parents and in 24 hours your status has changed and expectations from you is about reach the sky.You have never been without your family,you miss them and everything else ,your bed ,your pillow ,your closet etc..

One really doesn’t know how the first day would be,there are seniors and juniors here too.Would I be ragged ? Would I be treated as one of them? Would I get the time to adjust and learn their way? Would I be judged?

Zillions of questions on the head and butterflies in the stomach.

For some it’s easy and for some it’s no less than an exam with invigilators watching your every move creating a social anxiety. There would always be someone who is silently observing you and all you could do is smile and pretend to be comfortable.

Your brain starts working overtime and your sub conscious mind compares your parents home with this new home.

Back home you would never think twice before using the washroom, wearing weird clothes or even lying on the living room couch.But from the very first day here you always feel embarrassed thinking everybody would notice whenever you use the washroom,the clothes you wear, and be conscious the way you sit and chat with relatives. Feeling hungry? You will feel awkward in heading to the kitchen and look for snacks.

The first few days of marriage only reminds you that your life had taken a major turn and would look forward to the day when you wouldn’t hesitate before doing anything.

You may have opinions but would keep it to yourself,you may not like something about your spouse but wouldn’t know how to communicate in front of others.

You crave for some lone time with your partner and it’s tough to get that with people around.After the whole days work you want to retire early and spend some lone time.How do express your feelings?

But it’s difficult with people around.They have their own routines as a family for so many years and we can’t change them.It also takes time for them to include you in conversations and for you to involve yourself is not easy.

For some it takes months and for some years to feel everything around is normal and there is nothing more to compare with your parents home.It depends on how fast you accept them and they accept you.

Loads of adjustments and tons of patience is the only way to win hearts and has to come from both sides. Acknowledging and confronting these obstacles as a couple can deepen your bond and help you navigate through the bumpy roads to “Happily Ever After”.